Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
