Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
