I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
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