Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
