Is it because I queefed?
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
The uberlube is also flammable
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
