You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
