have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
