Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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