Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!�
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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