Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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