another moral hangover. fuck.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
