Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
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