Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
