You can't motorboat a personality
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Randomize
