I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Randomize
