I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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