Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
