Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Redeem this text for a blowjob
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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