i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
