i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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