she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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