This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
