Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
