i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
