I must be too annoying 4 u.
We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
She even gives head with a lisp.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
