i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
