im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I just blew my weed a kiss
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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