So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize
