And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of j�ger and an empty bed here Friday.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Randomize
