Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
