Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
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