why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
