Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
