After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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