its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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