Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
