You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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