if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
