hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
