Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
