You're completely useless in the revolution.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
should my penis look like a turkey
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
