your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Randomize
