using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
