"it" just moved
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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