I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
