So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
