On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Randomize