She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
