well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
