The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
