$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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